From: Ernie
Date: 30 Oct 2006
I often visit this website from time to time. Not really to see if any new posts are available to read but to read the ones that have been there before. The posts are infrequent now but that doesn’t mean that thoughts are forgotten. I know that I catch myself talking to Larry from time to time. Usually asking him where he is or what mountain or peak he is currently perched on top of. Although I have read most of the posts many times, I enjoy reading them again. This summer didn't seem to find me out in the mountains much. I have no excuse for my actions and it definitely had nothing to do with the passing of Larry. I have hit the mountain hard for the past 10 years and have taken my fair share of summit. Maybe it was time to give the mountains a break from me? This year did bring me to the high points of two major peaks which filled the gaps on my list (don’t deny it, we all have a list) – Glacier Peak and Mt. Adams. I don’t know why I waited so long to enjoy the views from these high points? Well, I guess I do know, both Larry and Andy chose to do them years ago and with new peaks on the horizon, I didn’t want to pass up a chance to climb with good friends. Besides the mountains aren’t going anywhere and they can have patience for my presence although I wonder what it would have been like to stand on top of Mt St. Helens before 1980. I guess I’ll never have that chance. Anyways, this summer both peaks fell in line and it happened. Over the 4th of July, I spent 3 days with Bill, Gary and friends going into Glacier Peak from the south side – White Pass. I was never scheduled to be on that trip because Larry, Andy and I had planned a peak bagging trip north of Holden near Lake Chelan. It was one of our usual deals where a week of climbing seemed more like a week of work for most but for us, brought a week of non stopping days, restful nights and views from the most heavenly places (memories as well). After Larry’s death, both Andy and I decided it was best to cancel the trip and part for the week to do our own thing. At first you’d think that a trip together would be good but you know… it was the right decision. So I went towards Glacier and Andy headed east to search for mountains with different views. I often write on my climbing trips but this time I made only a small entry into my journal. I wrote of Larry’s passing but left it more to thought. The stars were out those nights. Returning from Glacier added another summit to my list. You know, I’ve told myself as well as other that the mountains like me. The Cascades have given me excellent weather every time I go out and I haven’t been turned back on a summit since Andy and I attempted Marble Peak back in ……well, I don’t remember the year but I know by experience that Marble turns back everyone at least on their first attempted. So I guess I can take partial credit for the excellent weather we had on Glacier. I’d say that most of it came from the one above and maybe Larry as well. Can you believe that was my first summit of the year? The second and I believe the last summit I’ll climb this year came in late August when I took a group of climbing students up Mt. Adams. Ahhhhh…. The joys of standing on my last ‘Major’ in Washington State and yes, great views along with another beautiful day. It had been a while since I had been up past 11,000 plus feet and I felt it. With a group of 8, I wander away and found a quiet spot by myself to enjoy the view of Mt. Rainier and rest my soul. My thoughts of why I come to these places, my life in general and the passing of Larry made my rest different. Hard to explain I guess. Again, I didn’t write and left it all to thought. You wonder where our thoughts go when they don’t make it to paper but then I thought, I really don’t write as much as I think so thoughts are free to come and go as they wish. It was good to get home after Mt. Adams and it was okay to not have anything on the schedule. That was something hard for me to believe. To look out over the rest of the year and see nothing related to the mountains. It felt okay. Thinking about excuses for not being in the mountains, I guess I have one. My boys are getting older now and spending more time with them is more important. Not that it wasn’t that way before but those who have kids can understand what I mean. Priorities always come first. So what’s in store for next year? Well, maybe this year isn’t over yet. My favorite time of the year to get into the mountains is just starting. Maybe I should be checking the list of “un-done” peaks and dust off the snowshoes. Even though Larry is not here physically, I can honestly say on his behalf that snowshoeing for him was by far the best time of the year. For Larry, Andy and my self, being from the Midwest, snowshoeing brought back something. The snow, the cold and the silent sounds of the forest, snow slopes and the snow blanketed views. Most of my summits with Larry were on snowshoe trips. I wonder if he has his choice of seasons? I can see him now with those blue mittens on and that OR hat with the flaps down. I guess I need a cold winter’s day, sitting on my pack by a frozen lake to get back into the writing phase. I never was much of a writer around civilization but I seem to be doing my best at the moment. Next year will bring another climbing season as well as a new climbing community through the Basic Course. It’s a joy to see new faces each year and this year even more since I won’t be school. I’ll have more time to spend with eager “want to be” climbers. It’s true that every year is a new year but to a climbing student, that “new year” is something special and it means something. I can’t speak for everyone but if others get the same feeling that I get when I hike a trail, scramble a ridge or climb a summit, than being a part of the Mountaineers program is well worth it. When I say that I can’t speak for everyone, I can speak for Larry. There’s more to write but I’ll save it for my journal. I don’t share my journal with anyone but this time sharing it was probably something that I needed to do. I plan to summit Lewis Peak next year, maybe on that same dreadful day. I don’t plan to search for the place of the accident though. There’s no need to. I wouldn’t find Larry’s spirit there anyways. His spirit would be waiting for me at the summit. Larry will be with us in spirit and the mountains will take joy in the spirit of Larry.